Snap. The dictionary closes.

For someone who loves literature, I really haven't read that much of it.

I hate that about myself. The fact is that I'm a slow reader and in the past year or two I've probably only read half a dozen books. It's disgusting. It needs to change. I'm embarrassed to even admit it.

Those of you who know me well will know that the main book I care about reading is the Bible. All other books pale into utter insignificance next to God's Word! So that's always right up the top of the reading list, the top of the study list.

As far as other books go, my first (rather drastic) idea for reading more is to take on less work next year and spend the whole of 2008 on a strict reading plan. It seems like a diet. I feel like I should get a consultation from a personal trainer or something. I think taking that year to read everything will benefit me endlessly in the long run. I don't know. Maybe it's a dumb idea. Maybe I should be living life instead of reading about it. But literature is important to me. Maybe I can find a balance. I love the feeling I get when there are ideas whizzing around my mind from something I've read. I think what you read colours everything you see.

And I want to be a better writer. There's a wolf on a mountain at the core of my very being that is howling to write. If I don't read, I will lose my language skills. I will lose my grammar skills. I will lose my... what's the word... vocabulary.

For me, through hard times in my life, sometimes words have been my only friend. Writing has been my alternative to self destructive behaviour. Being able to express something means it has less power over me. Writing it down validates my feelings right before my eyes. I guess the more you can unpack something - the more you begin to understand it - the easier it becomes to overcome. I like that sense of clarity. I seem to chase it in every area of my life. I want to know. I want to get it. To get it and to live it.

It all comes down to Honesty and Truth, and how those two fit together in The Great Puzzle.

So I'm going to be a reader. First port of call, my own bookcase. Well, my own three bookcases to be exact. I'm going to keep a detailed journal of what I read. I'm going to monitor my progress through the library.

I'm going to take notice of each new colour I see.